Shall we sing a different song this time
one that makes the leaves quiver like
a gentle breeze is passing by
Shall we take a different route this time
one that leads through wooded valleys
and meanders beside a tiny stream
Shall we try to understand this time
that we are two separate people
who are walking the same road
- Susannah Bec 2010
22 comments:
I like the choice of the "shall we" and the beginning of each verse. The ending is also quite conclusive, i really like this one Susannah.
Wonderful poem, Susannah! I'm so glad you stopped by my page, so I might find yours. I've peeked at a few of your pieces and will definitely come back when I have more time. May I also say that your blog itself is a thing of beauty! I love your header and description..
Hi Ladan, Thanks very much, I am glad you liked it.
Food to see you. :-)
Hi Lynette, thanks very much for your kind words. I was very glad to have discovered both of your blogs today and have bookmarked them so I can keep in touch with your posts.
It is really good to meet you. :-)
Ladan, I meant good to see you, not food to see you! (It made me giggle when I saw my typo!)
OH! MY! GOODNESS! This is the poem that should be handed to every couple starting out - do you think we can get it included as part of the wedding ceremony? Absolutely brilliant! And wise! Wonderful!
Hi Sherry, thanks as always for your lovely comment, it is always really great to see you. :-)
Susannah, I am so glad I discovered your poetry. You truly have a gift with words. I am new at Poets United, I am happy to be part of this poetry "scene". Look forward to reading your other poems.
Hi Square Corner, thanks for visiting, it is good to meet you. :-)
Susannah this is so pretty!
thanks for the visit!
Pamela
Thanks Pamela, it is good to meet you. :-)
Thank you for your recent comment :) I love your writing and your blog. Look forward to seeing more writing from you.
Thanks Bobbie. :-)
Look forward to reading more of your writing and looking at those wonderful Mandalas!
Good to meet you. :-)
your poem is like a song- grand in its comeliness.
Thank you so much Arian :-)
I like the different route that lead me here - I shall be back...
Thanks for visiting - I look forward to seeing you again jinksy! :-)
Hi Susannah,
Nice poem.felt the breeze myself......breeze...yes the leaves quivering.I feel like looking at 2 people walking through a road among woods and a soft breeze touching them...nice dear.
Hi Rashmi, I am glad you could experience it that way. :-)
It is very nice to meet you.
That ending...."Two separate people walking the same road" You had me reminiscing.
Good to see you Charles, thanks for dropping in. :-)
Ah I love the dance of life your show us here. It works so well with me right now. Thank you for sharing.
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