one moment
and all its nuances
fell from the long gone hour
like an edge dweller, a maverick
a loner screaming at the wind
and in its outstretched hand
layed the silent moon
like a peach
like a pebble
like an untold story
it knocked me over with its silent glare
with its unspoken prayer, with its modesty
and it stung like a nettle
a barb wrought from metal
jagged and potent
it burrowed like shrapnel
stinging and singing under my skin
.
© Susannah Bec 2011
30 comments:
The Missing Sky is so beautiful! I love the "silent moon, and the unspoken prayer, stinging and singing under my skin!"
Thank you very much Annell. x
"a loner screaming at the wind".......this poem is barbed, like the one wrought from metal, and pokes under my skin, in just the way you relate. Terrific writing! You nailed it!
Thanks Sherry. :-)
Lovely words and images. Excellent work....
Melanie
Thanks very much Melanie. :-) It is good to meet you.
Lovely images and contrasts here... a pleasurable read!
Thanks Laurie. it is good to meet you. :-)
this is one of those tiny little poems that grows and reveals more with each reading. I love it, and find it like a peach, both sharp and sweet.
Dixie / echo
Good to see you here Dixie, and thanks very much for your comment. ;-)
Wonderful writing. I love the image of the moon in the hand "like a peach like a pebble like an untold story". Wowzers, kiddo!
Just beautiful, beautiful words...
and in its outstretched hand
layed the silent moon
like a peach
like a pebble
like an untold story
whoosh, a powerful moment.
That's quite an encounter. Stinging and singing.
Thanks very much everyone for your kind comments, they are much appreciated. Good to see you all here, thanks for visiting. x
Very good, especially the second half.
Am going to try again, and hope the comment takes. I love this poem, its mystery and imagery, its rhythm and tone.
Elizabeth
beauty.......pain and pleasure all wrapped up in one......lovely!
Excellent poem Susannah
I really loved this one! You have talent a way with words that's so graceful
Thanks everyone for your kind comments. :-)
It is very good to meet those of you I haven't met before and it is always wonderful to see old friends. x
Susannah, I am so happy to have found your writings today. I am a lover of moon and sea and words that float and sing like yours do. I'm just singing up to follow your blog.
Gorgeous, Susannah - You have a beautiful mind and evoke wonderful emotion with your words. Thanks for sharing.
Warren
What can I say?!? Your descriptive words say so much more than I have thought of the vastness the sky can hold and it is such a wonder!
Victoria, Warren and Renee, thank you. :-)
It is good to meet those of you I haven't met before. x
kind of haunting, yet elegant and well done.
WOW - like a peach
like a pebble
like an untold story
so great. :)
I read and re-read this Susannah, playing with cadence and accent. The bottom line? No matter how I marked or paused, the raw emotions announced themselves.
Much music in this! Well done Susannah.
Thanks very much for your kind comments everyone. :-)
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