Upon the plain walls of my life,
there hangs a portrait. It is a good likeness.
And behind it, set into the discoloured patch
on the wall. Is a blank space.
And set within that blank space, is a secret safe.
Where I, have locked myself away.
And no one, would even begin to suspect,
that the portrait may not be me.
And that I, may be hidden behind it.
Sitting quietly alone, inside the safe.
© Susannah Bec 2011
This was written for the thursday think tank prompt and originally posted on my blog Panopticulated. I liked it, so moved it over here to keep it with my other writing.
Please forgive me if you have already read it.
14 comments:
Susannah, this is powerful stuff. A bit chilling, jarring, but DEFINITELY a good read!
Honestly written with powerful implications. A good poem is worth reading an infinite number of times.
Wow! I really like this. Incredible concept and so eloquently written. How often do we hide what we feel is the real portrait of ourselves behind the public face we would display?!
This resonates - the private interior person within the exterior, visible one........very thought-provoking. Good one, Susannah!
Watching them Swim, is so good
like reading the birth of fear.
Not Lonely, Just Alone, also has
an eerie quality...you're not
quite sure if you trust the
narrator.
Thanks everyone, I appreciate you reading and leaving a comment.
Good to see you. x
Great poem, I like the inherent metaphor. I think the only thing holding it back is the punctuation, of which there is too much (commas in places that they shouldn't be). You're a damn fine poet, glad I came across this site.
I like this, Susannah, very powerful.
I sometimes liken the inner person in me to the Count of Monte Cristo; without the need for revenge, of course. I hope one day to truly be free to be me. (Lived most of my life in fear - abusive father left his mark and I continue to mess up my life even though I should know better. He wins, mostly. Things however, do change.)
Brandon thank you for your kind words and your opinion. ;-) It is good to meet you, I hope you drop by again.
Thanks Paul, I hope that for you too. x
This poem was fantastic, I read it a number of times before moving on to the next ones.
It was very powerful, beautifully written, and incredibly honest.
Thanks very much SB, and thanks for visiting as it enabled me to find your blog too. I really enjoyed your Haikus, it is good to meet you. :-)
Beautiful. You reminded me of Oscar Wilde at some point, though your poem is so sweet it makes me want to carry you, so tiny, in my cupped hands.
Take care and keep smiling Susannah, and a kiss on your cheeks. <3
Thank you Kenia. :-) x
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